I work with an older Lutheran and an agnostic. Sadly, I was not present during this short conversation between the Lutheran and the agnostic, but the agnostic told me about this.

First off, I want to mention that I am proud of my little agnostic. She has learned many of the basics from me, so hopefully she will embrace her atheism and shed that agnostic title.

The conversation I missed out on, regretfully, was a topic of evolution. The agnostic always looks at some weekly pictures of animals she subscribes to. She came across a bonobo (she's never heard of them until recently, due to me) picture. The picture was a bonobo mom holding her baby. She is always astounded that they look so much like an old man. She then shows it to the Lutheran and says, "did you know they are our closest cousins?" She left out chimps, but that's ok.

Then the Lutheran spouts back with, "maybe your closest cousins, but I didn't come from the goo to the zoo to you." When the agnostic told me this, I laughed my ass off. As much as I am into reading whacko's writings, I have actually never heard this phrase before.

Well, since she is not a product of the "primordial soup" eventually breeding to water creatures eventually breeding to land dwellers eventually breeding into mammals eventually breeding to hominids, then where the frack did she come from?

She came from the fracking rib of the first man alive on this Earth 6,000 years ago, that's where. How could my logic go so wrong? And for those of you smart people out there that have actually read the bible (lack of caps intentional) and are thinking, "well, there is another creation story," you must keep in mind, people like this have actually not read the bible.

As said in the radio show today, the rib story is the one that is told in sermons. Why? Because males still want to be in control. Christians (caps only because it's the first word in the sentence) are not encouraged to read the bible in it's entirety. They are only told certain verses to read.

Considering clergy have to go through a good deal of schooling and actually reading the entire bible, they should have some clue that something is up. A decent portion of them have to know they are spewing garbage. We need to make it clear that there are funds out there to help clergy find other jobs after they have lost their faith. We also need to make it clear that clergy that have lost their faith, yet are raking in millions of dollars need to stopped.

Also, I deserve a round of applause for making this the least profane rant I have ever written (I don't know the boundaries for this site).

I found a really funny evangelical board game at a garage sale once called "From Goo to You by Way of the Zoo". I used to play it with some adults with disabilities I worked with, and they thought it was the dumbest, funniest thing they had ever seen!