Atheist Top 30
By Eric Jayne
Like it or not, Christian music is undoubtedly popular. Among my daughter’s peer group “Jesus Take the Wheel,” by Carrie Underwood, is a very popular song that her friends sing when they get together. During my own adolescence I was an unwilling participant in an evangelical youth group where many discussions took place regarding Christian artists like Amy Grant, Petra, and DC Talk. Given the seemingly timeless popularity and ubiquity of pious music I felt the need to come up with a list of my favorite pro-atheist songs, many of which are delightfully sacrilegious. Some of these songs promote rational freethought, some satirize religious beliefs, and others celebrate science. In creating this list I factored musical composition and anti-ecclesiastical lyrics. Although this list consists of only 30 songs I will pretend to be Casey Kasem and introduce them in the American Top 40 show fashion starting with number 30.
This lyrically simple song will have you wondering if Keith Moon isn’t a god
29. “The Element Song” Tom Leher
Not exactly anti-ecclesiastical but a brilliant song about the Periodic Table
28. “Do You Realize??” Flaming Lips
Humanistic lyrics that give awe to the cosmos
27. “Atheist Peace” Bad Religion
Sometimes loud punk/metal is good for the soul
26. “The Galaxy Song” Monty Python
Have a problem? Listening to this will make it (and you) seem insignificant
Newman unabashedly tells it how it is
24. “The Origin of Species” MC Frontalot
Funny rap song satirizing creationist arguments
23. “What if No One’s Watching” Ani DiFranco
Ani encourages us to not be afraid to ask questions and be skeptical
22. “Religion and Politics” Scott Beach
Hilarious spoken-word piece that is timeless
21. “Hellalujah” Insane Clown Posse
Don’t listen to this hip-hop song around young children
20. “East Jesus Nowhere” Green Day
Anti-church song from Green Day’s latest album
19. “Every Sperm in Sacred” Monty Python
Everyone should be familiar with this anti-Catholic comedic gem!
John encourages us to believe in ourselves in lieu of deities and political idols
17. “Jesus Loves Me (But He Can’t Stand You)” Austin Lounge Lizards
Tongue-in-cheek country song depicting “red state” philosophy
Somewhat satirical, “Jesus Christ Superstar” rocks and celebrates skepticism
15. “Fuck the Creationists” MC Hawking
Self explanatory song title performed by a Stephen Hawking impersonator
14. “Shallow Be Thy Game” Red Hot Chili Peppers
Alternative rock anti-God song from the band’s classic 1995 album
13. “God Shuffled His Feet” Crash Test Dummies
You’ll feel like Larry Craig when you’re toe-tapping to this clever melody
12. “It Ain’t Necessarily So” Cher
Song about biblical baloney from George Gershwin opera, “Porgy & Bess”
11. “The Only Way (Hymn)” Emerson Lake & Palmer
A Hymn for humanists written by one of the best progressive rock bands
10. “Shuffering & Shmiling” Dead Prez
African hip-hop dance song critical of Christian/western colonization
Modern folk-rock song lambasting the Torah, Koran and Bible
08. “The Idiots are Taking Over” NOFX
Punk rock song echoing the angst we freethinking atheists feel
07. “Only the Good Die Young” Billy Joel
Because atheists would “rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints”
06. “Jesus Wants Me for a Sunbeam” The Vaselines
An old children‘s Christian song with an impious spin (later covered by Nirvana.
05. “A Rational Response” Greydon Square
YO! Square’s dropping fresh beats & cogent lyrics for straight up freethought rap
04. “Arc of Time (Time Code)” Bright Eyes
Techno dance song with great sarcastic lines about Jesus, heaven and angels
03. “The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing”/”Dumb All Over”/”Heavenly Bank Account” Frank Zappa
Three fantastic anti-religious songs that MUST be listened to in succession
Just about everyone knows this beautiful humanistic anthem
01. “Dear God” XTC
This has it all: catchy melody, powerful singing and unapologetic lyrics